How do I know that I have found the one?

How do I know that I have found the one is a question that people ask me all the time? When we talk about sex, which is really an enormous series of changes that have taken place in relationships.

First of all, there are three primary sexual revolutions.

  • The advent of contraception. Without which women could never experience sexuality without women and men could never experience the freedom of separating sex from reproduction.
  • The women’s movement, which took on the abuses of power.
  • The gay movement, which introduced the concept of sexual identity. For most of history sexuality was seen as a part of our biology. Today we have socialized it. It is a part of who we are, of our identity, of how I see myself of how I express myself.

We no longer just have sex for reproduction. Neither is it in long-term relationships or in relationships that are with some some length. And it is no longer just a woman’s marital duty today. Sexuality, especially after two kids if you have two or three which is the average Western thing, it’s basically for pleasure and connection. No other motive so it better be good because in order to want sex it needs to be sex that is worth wanting. 

This is really a major shift to have sexuality that is based only on wanting. And hopefully I want you and you want me and it happens to be at the same time. 

It is giving us a unique opportunity to finally open up the narrow boxes in which masculinity femininity, male and female, have been locked up for way too long for. The last 40 years, we have done in the West and everywhere else a little bit of the beginning work, but very significant work to help women find their power in their voice. 

If we are going to work towards true equality We will match our intense efforts in helping women find power and voice With our intense efforts to help men be able to share their heart and their vulnerability.

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